Sunday, October 28, 2012


Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! It felt as if somebody knocked me on my tender head with a giant hammer when I stumbled upon this quotation. Had I been holding on to certain memories so hard all this time that I failed to see the truth and reality behind them? Looking back at certain memories, I can remember many things that took place back then but ironically, I can't even recall the names of some of the people who were with me at that time. Memories are very much like an infectious disease; easy to contract and difficult to shake off. We tend to remember only the good parts, neglecting the fact that sometimes there were a lot of pain and heartaches too. Obviously, I am in a much better position and state of mind/emotion today than I ever was in the past and yet, the not-so-fantastic old times always seemed so much better to me. Strange as it is but that's the truth. Conversations with my former high school buddies (a few of them are still my good friends until now) always revolved around the memories but never the people. We talked about how much we missed our teenage years but never said how much we missed somebody whom we knew then. I once went to my high school reunion a few years ago and I never went back since. I had never really understood my reluctance to attend the annual gathering despite the persistent coaxing and phone calls from my ex-schoolmates. It's only now that I realise now that I don't really miss most of the people I grew up with. I only miss the memories. In the back of my mind, maybe I knew that meeting them could never bring the memories back. I even realise that many of my posts are quite 'past-oriented' in nature. Re-reading them only reaffirms my belief that it was the memories that made me tick and not the people. I also had a tendency to connect everything around me with certain memories, thus making the past look even more wonderful than it truly was. I believe that a lot of people do feel exactly that way too; thinking that the past was fantastic when actually, it might not even be that great after all. Memories to many of us (including me) are simply blurry, happy mental pictures with countless and nameless people in them. Bring in the real people who were part of our past and we can see the the good, the bad and the ugly of the whole thing. In today's world, nostalgia is undoubtedly big business and entrepreneurs know they can play with the emotions of those who have a keen interest in the days gone by. My fascination (even obsession, maybe) with certain collectibles and the desire to obtain them are testaments to this. I had never thought twice paying for something that I really wanted. Having the item in my hands was like being transported to the past; a past that my mind had subconsciously (and possibly falsely too) painted with happy images and cheerful colours. It was a feeling of indescribable bliss and ecstasy. All in all, I'm not saying it's wrong to miss the memories since they will always be a part of our lives. All that I'm trying to say is don't let the memories be seen through a rose-tinted glass and don't ever forget that for the most part, it was the people that gave us the memories. Without these people, there would be no memories to begin with.